October 2, 2009
Three steps to get grandparents online
[Editor's note: Grandpa Shayne Packer is also a columnist for GRAND Magazine's new Cyber-Savvy GRAND column.]
“You’ll never get me on one of them newfangled computers!” Have you ever heard a grandparent say that? Are they intimidated by the Internet? Not willing to give today’s technology a try? We’ll show you what you can do to get them online.
Who should read this
- Grandparents who are privileged to have one or more of your parents still living.
- Parents who would like to facilitate a healthy relationship between your children and their grandparents and great-grandparents.
- Anyone who knows a grandmother or grandfather who is reluctant or afraid to dip their foot into the internet.
Technophobia: the fear or dislike of advanced technology. Why doesn’t everybody welcome new technology? Fear of the unknown? Afraid they will ruin or break something? They don’t understand and don’t remember?
One problem is that many senior grandparents just don’t know what they are missing — photos of the grandbabies, emails, family blogs, Facebook, text messages, video chats, sharing their life story. They are not enjoying all the new opportunities to communicate with their families; sometimes from their own stubbornness.
The benefits outweigh the fear
A friend shared a story about a coworker, a grandfather who refused to learn to send text messages using his mobile phone. My friend encouraged the grandfather to learn so he could send text messages to his grandchildren. “Just try it.” Two weeks later, the grandfather reported that he was having a wonderful time texting with his grandkids.
Grandparents need to keep up with the times and communicate with the younger generations on the media the kids are comfortable using. This will enhance the quality of the relationship between grandparents and grandchildren when they may not actually see each other for many months.
Grandparents should realize that being “computer smart” is a way to get closer to their grandchildren. Also, the World Wide Web is a wonderful way to find ideas of things to do with grandkids when they visit.
My oldest sister is a great example of someone who has embraced internet technology to connect with her family. When her daughter recently encouraged my sister to get Facebook, she quibbled, “Why would I want on Facebook?” Here daughter simply replied, “Because that’s where the photos of the grandbabies are!”
So her daughter got on the computer and set up a Facebook account right then. Now my sister has really enjoys Facebook, as well as other websites, email, etc.
God gave us loving grandchildren as a reward for all our random acts of kindness. ~Janet Lanese
3 steps to get grandparents online
1. Sit together at the computer and give them a tour around the Web — all the fun family stuff they’re missing out on. First, you drive. This is especially important for the reluctant grandparent. Do this before you let them know you intend to help them get online. Let them get hooked first.
2. Set up one website at a time for them, and let them know what you are doing (in simple terms). See the Recommended websites below.
3. For each website, put them in the driver’s seat. Let them try things one click at a time. Go slow. Be patient. Go through it twice: first for comprehension, second to create written step-by-step instructions. If needed, go through it a third time to help build their confidence.
You can help enrich a grandparent’s life. Now go do it!
Enjoy! – Grandpa Shayne
Action Items
- Help them choose a computer. I recommend an Apple Macintosh laptop because it is so easy to use and comes with cool, free software.
- Set up a free gmail account.
- Collect a list of family websites and blogs.
- Create accounts on Facebook or other sites where the family posts stuff.
- Create easy-to-remember login names and passwords, and write them down.
- Bookmark all websites. Show them how to access these bookmarks.
- Set them up a free blog or their own on WordPress.com or Blogger.com. (optional)
- If they have a digital camera, show them how to post photos online.
Recommended websites
More resources
- Our other blog posts about connecting with grandchildren
- Another post “How to help grandparents get online“
- Many senior centers, libraries, colleges, etc. offer classes in basic internet and computer use.
If you know someone who is not online, please print and mail this to them.
Do you have more ideas for helping more grandparents get online? We welcome your comments.
Tweet this. Also, we invite you to subscribe to our blog.
If you like this post, please share it or email it to your friends!
Filed under Connecting, Cool Websites, Grandparents, Internet by Grandpa Shayne
Comments on Three steps to get grandparents online »
Then again, there are a few of us whose parents know more about tech stuff than we do, right Dad!
@Emily – Thank you. So you’re saying that I taught you everything you know, right?
I must admit I didn’t think there is a site on this topic, I must congratulate you! I am young but have around me people that struggle with a computer, not understanding what’s the story. I am always happy to see someone older than me learns how to surf the internet and finds great joy in it. Congratulations again for this website!
That’s what our Dad used to tell me, Shayne. And to get the story straight, “I had never even heard of FaceBook.” Now I have my own BlackBerry cel phone with internet and everything else on it. And, I LOVE text messaging. It’s instant. And these kids (& us) can do it from anywhere. Thanks for all your encouragement! Dawn
Hi Shayne! I just sent this article to all my aunties and uncles who – most of them not grandparents yet – but still don’t really use computers to keep in touch with their own adult children. I think the initial fear is what prevents most of them from trying. The computer is ‘odd’ for someone who’s never used one, so patience and explaining thing that are by now to most people just second nature are good advice!!
This is a great article! My father, who is 94, still uses his computer. He became ill last year and wasn’t able to use it for a number of months, but recently he wanted to get back to it. We had to retrain him a bit. You are so right that the grandparent must be in the driver’s seat. I sit right by my dad, but I resist the temptation to reach over and click for him. No matter the age, we learn by doing!
Wow, a post packed with great information. I find that many grandparents are already of an age where change is very difficult. On the other side are those that embrace change (the internet) and move ahead to their credit. I am of the latter group. I’ve found it great for improved communication with not just grands but my children as well.