[Kay Fontana, "The Grandcoach," is our featured guest writer today. Kay helps baby boomers overcome the challenges of raising grandchildren. She is a former teacher, certified coach, mother of 3 and grandmother of 7.]

Spending time with your grandchildren is a gift and a blessing. For grandparents who are raising their grandchildren, they receive the gift of time every day.

For grandparents who live far away or do not have the opportunity to see their grandchildren often, the joy of seeing them and them seeing you, still exists with the use of modern technology, specifically, audio, video and digital photos. Today, I would like to focus on digital photos.

The 3 basic steps to sharing photos on the Internet

• Selecting the camera to use
• Selecting the photo viewing program to use
• Importing the pictures into the photo program

Selecting the camera

If you do not have a digital camera yet, I encourage you to do so. Digital cameras now range in price of $59.00 all the way to thousands of dollars. The inexpensive ones work very well and serve their purpose. They are actually higher quality and less expensive than they were 10 years ago.

Look for a camera that uses a memory card that fits into your computer. On your computer, you may see something like Compact Flash, Micro Drive, SD*MMC*MS, Pro*XD, or something similar to that. Your computer’s owner’s manual can help you select the correct media storage device. Most cameras also offer the option of downloading the picture using a USB cable. If you are shopping online, the product details should give you all the information. Just make sure your camera’s storage device can be used in your computer, or your camera can be connected to your computer to import the pictures.

Selecting the photo viewing program

There are several online photo services that let you organize, edit and share your photos. Many are free. The 3 that I use are Picasa, Flickr and Kodak Gallery. Today, I will focus on Picasa.

Picasa is free photo editing software from Google. Enjoy this two minute video about Picasa.

If you have a Google email (gmail.com) account, the Picasa service can be accessed by your Gmail account. If you do not have a Gmail account, you can create one for free at Google.com.

You will also need to install the Picasa program on your computer, which is also free. If you don’t see it as an option on the Google home page, just enter picasa.google.com in your browser to bring it up, and click “Download Picasa 3.”

Importing photos

Once you have created your Gmail account and installed Picasa, you are ready to download (or import) your pictures from your digital camera. Once you have set up the Picasa application and have downloaded pictures from your camera, the Picasa program should automatically open every time you insert a media storage device in your computer (or connect via USB cable).

Once you have downloaded the pictures from your camera, you can click on “Web Albums” on the top right portion of your screen, which will take you directly to your Google Web Album in your Internet browser.

You can also access your web album by going to www.google.com to log into you Gmail account. When you are in your account, click on “Photos,” which is located on the top left portion of the page. If you don’t see it, then click on “more” and it will be under that.

It takes a little time to maneuver around Picasa, but it is my favorite one to use. When you become familiar with the program, you can sort photos into different albums. You can also set up privacy features on your albums so only your family and friends can view selected items. Google also has a lot of nice features that are great for sharing with your family, such as calendars, blogs and groups, but more on that another time.

If you don’t have a digital camera, or have one and haven’t set up an account online to download your photos, I encourage you to do so. Picasa is free to use, and once you set it up, you can have your family upload photos to your albums for your whole family to enjoy.

Warm regards,

Kay Fontana
“The Grandcoach”
www.CoachingForQuality.com

[In future posts, GrandparentsTLC will review more ways of sharing photos online, including Apple's Macintosh iPhoto application and MobileMe.]

Have you used Picasa or another photo sharing program? How has it enabled you to connect with your family and grandkids? Please share your comments. We enjoy reading about your experiences.

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Technorati Tags: activity, computer, connect, digital-camera, family, gmail, google, Grandchildren, grandparent, Internet, picasa, technology, tutorial, website

[We are pleased to feature Emily Wilberg as a guest writer. Emily’s son, Gabriel, was stillborn at 21 weeks gestation in May 2002. Her husband, Nick, is an illustrator and designer, and the two of them have designed several items for grieving parents and grandparents, including scrapbooking quotes suitable for scrapbooking a baby who has died. She has 4 living children in addition to her angel Gabriel. Emily is the author of the blog, Stepping Stones: a path to healing after the loss of a child. Emily says, "I never thought my life would take this turn. Maybe I had this particular baby (Gabriel) and married this particular man (Nick, an illustrator) in order to do some small good in this world.]“

[October has been designated as "Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month", with October 15 as "Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day".]

When my son Gabriel was stillborn at 21 weeks we were blindsided. I had no idea that in this age of modern medicine and in a country as prosperous as the United States that babies still died. I thought it was something that only happened in third world counties, or maybe back in the pioneer days. And yet, it does happen. When a baby dies it is hard on the entire family — but I can imagine it is uniquely hard for a grandparent. Not only are you, yourself grieving the loss of your grandbaby, but your own child is hurting as well. What do you do? What CAN you do?

Often people do nothing. It used to be that when a baby died (either before or shortly after birth), the mother was not allowed to hold or see her child. She was told to forget and to try again as soon as possible. Things have changed. It has been discovered that it is better for the healing process if the mom is able to see her baby if possible; for the parents to hold and dress and photograph and name their child. If the baby was lost earlier in the pregnancy the parents may not be able to do even this. But the moment a mom finds out she is expecting she starts making plans for, and loving, her child. A loss at any stage is devastating. To be told to forget and move on can be hurtful; no matter how well intentioned the advice is.

There are support groups to help a family facing this trial. But even though this outside help is important, I often hear that families do not feel supported by those closest to them: their own family members. Part of this is due to differences in how our generations have been told to grieve. Part of it is probably due to the fact that family members are grieving themselves. And part of it, maybe, is that it is just too sad. Too sad to think about and too sad to talk about and certainly too sad to make a particular point to remember. And yet, that is often exactly what grieving parents need, people to remember.

You need to do what is best for you while grieving your grandchild. Nobody grieves the same and there is no straight path for healing from this loss. But it is also important to reach out to your child.

How can you help your child who has lost a baby?

Listen. Let us talk. Let us cry. Ask to hear our baby’s story and ask what we named our child. Refer to them by name. Our child’s name is precious to us; we treasure an engraved ornament or even something as simple as writing our baby’s name in a card to let us know you are thinking about us both.

Holidays can be particularly hard. Understand if the parents may not be up to big family celebrations at this time. If you do have a family dinner, a possible tradition to start is to have a toast to remember all missing family members not at the table with you. You can also make a donation to a worthy cause or do a service project in your grandchild’s name.

Technology can help families pull together in times of trial — there are many ways. Send emails often. Take advantage of inexpensive long distance to call frequently — with mobile phones, or iChat, or Internet phones such as Skype and Vonage. Use reminder services for special occasions like the ones available at flowers.com and electronic greeting cards.

The Internet brings our world closer together and makes multiple resources available that may not be available in your immediate community. There are many online resources and support groups for families grieving the loss of a child. There are even specific sites for grieving grandparents. I have listed a few helpful sites below.

Aloha Sand Photos is a recent project I have started with my sister is to take a photo of a child’s name written in the sand and post a photo of it on our blog. I am in Maryland and she is in Hawaii, and the names come from all over the world. One grateful parent recently sent me an email stating, “I love technology. I can simply do this… and photos can come across the world from Hawaii. I am grateful. It has brought me into a very sorrowful yet hopeful club of parents with children who grew wings far too early.”

God sends children to enlarge our hearts, and make us unselfish and full of kindly sympathies and affections. ~Mary Howitt

Thank you to Grandpa Shayne for letting me write this guest post on his blog. I am sorry this topic is needed at all, and yet, I am thankful to be allowed to share my experience it in the hopes it will bring comfort to someone else. I hope today is gentle for you.

Peace -Emily (Gabriel’s mom)

Online Resources

• Aloha Remembered Blog: Have your grandchild’s name written in the sand and a photo posted on their blog.
• Stepping Stones: a path to healing after the loss of a child is a good general blog for finding helpful information.
• Stepping Stones article: Common Signs of Grief
• Grieving Grandparents Bereavement Support Article
• Grandparent Grief pamphlet from the SIDS network
• The Grief of Grandparents article by Compassionate Friends
• Helping a Grandparent Who Is Grieving Article by Alan D. Wolfelt, PH.D
• Healing Hearts: Support for Grieving Grandparents Email Penpals
• Remembering Our Angels: Gifts and ribbons for purchase.

Do you have any thoughts or ideas about helping grandparents and parents heal after the loss of a child? We welcome your comments.

Please share this post with someone you love.

Technorati Tags: baby, grandbaby, grandchild, grandparent, grieving, healing, infant-loss, Internet, love, pregnancy-loss, skype, stillborn, technology

[Editor's note: Grandpa Shayne Packer is also a columnist for GRAND Magazine's new Cyber-Savvy GRAND column.]

“You’ll never get me on one of them newfangled computers!” Have you ever heard a grandparent say that? Are they intimidated by the Internet? Not willing to give today’s technology a try? We’ll show you what you can do to get them online.

Who should read this

• Grandparents who are privileged to have one or more of your parents still living.
• Parents who would like to facilitate a healthy relationship between your children and their grandparents and great-grandparents.
• Anyone who knows a grandmother or grandfather who is reluctant or afraid to dip their foot into the internet.

Technophobia: the fear or dislike of advanced technology. Why doesn’t everybody welcome new technology? Fear of the unknown? Afraid they will ruin or break something? They don’t understand and don’t remember?

One problem is that many senior grandparents just don’t know what they are missing — photos of the grandbabies, emails, family blogs, Facebook, text messages, video chats, sharing their life story. They are not enjoying all the new opportunities to communicate with their families; sometimes from their own stubbornness.

The benefits outweigh the fear

A friend shared a story about a coworker, a grandfather who refused to learn to send text messages using his mobile phone. My friend encouraged the grandfather to learn so he could send text messages to his grandchildren. “Just try it.” Two weeks later, the grandfather reported that he was having a wonderful time texting with his grandkids.

Grandparents need to keep up with the times and communicate with the younger generations on the media the kids are comfortable using. This will enhance the quality of the relationship between grandparents and grandchildren when they may not actually see each other for many months.

Grandparents should realize that being “computer smart” is a way to get closer to their grandchildren. Also, the World Wide Web is a wonderful way to find ideas of things to do with grandkids when they visit.

My oldest sister is a great example of someone who has embraced internet technology to connect with her family. When her daughter recently encouraged my sister to get Facebook, she quibbled, “Why would I want on Facebook?” Here daughter simply replied, “Because that’s where the photos of the grandbabies are!”

So her daughter got on the computer and set up a Facebook account right then. Now my sister has really enjoys Facebook, as well as other websites, email, etc.

God gave us loving grandchildren as a reward for all our random acts of kindness. ~Janet Lanese

3 steps to get grandparents online

1. Sit together at the computer and give them a tour around the Web — all the fun family stuff they’re missing out on. First, you drive. This is especially important for the reluctant grandparent. Do this before you let them know you intend to help them get online. Let them get hooked first.

2. Set up one website at a time for them, and let them know what you are doing (in simple terms). See the Recommended websites below.

3. For each website, put them in the driver’s seat. Let them try things one click at a time. Go slow. Be patient. Go through it twice: first for comprehension, second to create written step-by-step instructions. If needed, go through it a third time to help build their confidence.

You can help enrich a grandparent’s life. Now go do it!

Enjoy! – Grandpa Shayne

Action Items

• Help them choose a computer. I recommend an Apple Macintosh laptop because it is so easy to use and comes with cool, free software.
• Set up a free gmail account.
• Collect a list of family websites and blogs.
• Create accounts on Facebook or other sites where the family posts stuff.
• Create easy-to-remember login names and passwords, and write them down.
• Bookmark all websites. Show them how to access these bookmarks.
• Set them up a free blog or their own on WordPress.com or Blogger.com. (optional)
• If they have a digital camera, show them how to post photos online.

Recommended websites

• Gmail.com
• Facebook.com
• MyFamily.com
• StoryOfMyLife.com
• ScrapBlog.com

More resources

• Our other blog posts about connecting with grandchildren
• Another post “How to help grandparents get online“
• Many senior centers, libraries, colleges, etc. offer classes in basic internet and computer use.

If you know someone who is not online, please print and mail this to them.

Do you have more ideas for helping more grandparents get online? We welcome your comments.

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Happy Grandparents Day 2009 to all of our readers who are grandparents.

And for you readers who are privileged to have your grandparents still here, welcome to our blog. We hope you will find inspiration and ideas to show your grandparents just how much you cherish them; how much they mean to you. We encourage you to help your grandparents learn about technology and the Internet so they will feel comfortable and excited to use these tools to communicate and connect with their family. See our other posts, including “How to help grandparents get online“.

About National Grandparents Day…

Grandparents Day is a United States secular holiday, celebrated on the first Sunday after Labor Day. Marian H. McQuade is recognized as the founder Grandparents Day, and the first national Grandparent’s Day was celebrated in 1978. See Wikipedia and Grandparents-Day.com.

A fun cartoon a friend drew for me…

Thanks Marvin!

Some favorite grandparent quotes…

It is as grandmothers that our mothers come into the fullness of their grace. ~Christopher Morley

Grandchildren are God’s way of compensating us for growing old. ~Mary H. Waldrip

Grandchildren: the only people who can get more out of you than the IRS. ~Gene Perret

Some of our favorite books for Grandparents

Free certificates to print for your special Grandma or Grandpa

We hope you’ve enjoyed this Grandparents Day tribute to grandparents. As always, we welcome your comments. How do you plan to celebrate Grandparents Day?

- Grandpa Shayne

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Grammy Tanda and I are celebrating our 33 1/3 year anniversary this weekend! That’s a third of a century! She is a wonderful lady. It’s been a fun adventure so far!

Shayne and Tanda Wedding March 12, 1976

We are blessed with 5 children and 8 grandchildren.

- Grandpa Shayne

Technorati Tags: anniversary, family, grammy, Grandchildren, grandparent, love, personal