[Editor's note: Grandpa Shayne Packer is also a columnist for GRAND Magazine's new Cyber-Savvy GRAND column.]

“You’ll never get me on one of them newfangled computers!” Have you ever heard a grandparent say that? Are they intimidated by the Internet? Not willing to give today’s technology a try? We’ll show you what you can do to get them online.

Who should read this

• Grandparents who are privileged to have one or more of your parents still living.
• Parents who would like to facilitate a healthy relationship between your children and their grandparents and great-grandparents.
• Anyone who knows a grandmother or grandfather who is reluctant or afraid to dip their foot into the internet.

Technophobia: the fear or dislike of advanced technology. Why doesn’t everybody welcome new technology? Fear of the unknown? Afraid they will ruin or break something? They don’t understand and don’t remember?

One problem is that many senior grandparents just don’t know what they are missing — photos of the grandbabies, emails, family blogs, Facebook, text messages, video chats, sharing their life story. They are not enjoying all the new opportunities to communicate with their families; sometimes from their own stubbornness.

The benefits outweigh the fear

A friend shared a story about a coworker, a grandfather who refused to learn to send text messages using his mobile phone. My friend encouraged the grandfather to learn so he could send text messages to his grandchildren. “Just try it.” Two weeks later, the grandfather reported that he was having a wonderful time texting with his grandkids.

Grandparents need to keep up with the times and communicate with the younger generations on the media the kids are comfortable using. This will enhance the quality of the relationship between grandparents and grandchildren when they may not actually see each other for many months.

Grandparents should realize that being “computer smart” is a way to get closer to their grandchildren. Also, the World Wide Web is a wonderful way to find ideas of things to do with grandkids when they visit.

My oldest sister is a great example of someone who has embraced internet technology to connect with her family. When her daughter recently encouraged my sister to get Facebook, she quibbled, “Why would I want on Facebook?” Here daughter simply replied, “Because that’s where the photos of the grandbabies are!”

So her daughter got on the computer and set up a Facebook account right then. Now my sister has really enjoys Facebook, as well as other websites, email, etc.

God gave us loving grandchildren as a reward for all our random acts of kindness. ~Janet Lanese

3 steps to get grandparents online

1. Sit together at the computer and give them a tour around the Web — all the fun family stuff they’re missing out on. First, you drive. This is especially important for the reluctant grandparent. Do this before you let them know you intend to help them get online. Let them get hooked first.

2. Set up one website at a time for them, and let them know what you are doing (in simple terms). See the Recommended websites below.

3. For each website, put them in the driver’s seat. Let them try things one click at a time. Go slow. Be patient. Go through it twice: first for comprehension, second to create written step-by-step instructions. If needed, go through it a third time to help build their confidence.

You can help enrich a grandparent’s life. Now go do it!

Enjoy! – Grandpa Shayne

Action Items

• Help them choose a computer. I recommend an Apple Macintosh laptop because it is so easy to use and comes with cool, free software.
• Set up a free gmail account.
• Collect a list of family websites and blogs.
• Create accounts on Facebook or other sites where the family posts stuff.
• Create easy-to-remember login names and passwords, and write them down.
• Bookmark all websites. Show them how to access these bookmarks.
• Set them up a free blog or their own on WordPress.com or Blogger.com. (optional)
• If they have a digital camera, show them how to post photos online.

Recommended websites

• Gmail.com
• Facebook.com
• MyFamily.com
• StoryOfMyLife.com
• ScrapBlog.com

More resources

• Our other blog posts about connecting with grandchildren
• Another post “How to help grandparents get online“
• Many senior centers, libraries, colleges, etc. offer classes in basic internet and computer use.

If you know someone who is not online, please print and mail this to them.

Do you have more ideas for helping more grandparents get online? We welcome your comments.

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Grammy Tanda and I are celebrating our 33 1/3 year anniversary this weekend! That’s a third of a century! She is a wonderful lady. It’s been a fun adventure so far!

Shayne and Tanda Wedding March 12, 1976

We are blessed with 5 children and 8 grandchildren.

- Grandpa Shayne

Grammy Tanda wrote a mother’s day post about the lessons she has learned from her Grandmothers. And I’ve been thinking about the lessons I’ve learned from my two Grandfathers and from reading about the lives of my other ancestors.

I was fortunate to know both of my grandfathers when I was young. They were an important part of my life. They both lived in the same city where I grew up. Over the years, I have grown to admire and appreciate both of these wonderful men.

They were true pioneers, born and raised in the late 1800′s. They were men of integrity. Hard work was their friend. They built houses, planted orchards and gardens and flowers. They hauled freight with horses and wagons. My Grandpa Packer was also a rancher and a farmer. My Grandpa Webb owned a saw mill. He also made hundreds of thousands of bricks by hand.

Both of my grandfathers raised large families. They were good providers. They were religious men who taught their children honorable character traits, reinforced through their own examples.

In their older years, family gatherings and family reunions were very important to my grandfathers.

You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was. ~Abraham Lincoln

I love being a grandpa myself. I follow in the traditions of my grandfathers, my father and father-in-law in having a fun time with the grandkids. They loved being funny, giving “horsy” rides on their knee, and back rides too.

I also love to play musical instruments with the grandkids, especially percussion instruments. We read lots of stories. We make up stories with the grandkids as the main characters. We tell funny jokes. A sense of humor is an essential requirement for grandfathers.

What are some of the valuable lessons you have learned from your grandfather? What do you admire and love about him? We look forward to reading your comments.

Wishing a Happy Father’s Day to each of our readers, fathers, and grandfathers.

- Grandpa Shayne

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Loving mothers and grandmothers give of themselves unselfishly. However, in the back of their minds they may sometimes wonder, “Have I taught them enough? Do they know this or that?” Sometimes on a discouraging day they may think, “Oh, I haven’t really made any impact on the world. I’m just a mom. I’m just a grandma.”

All I really need to know I learned from my Grandmother. ~Charles E. Smoot

One of the favorite gifts I have received from my adult children took me be surprise. The gift was a journal titled “Lessons I Have Learned.” They pointed out the kind of impact I had had upon them. They had filled in the first few pages — each of them writing about lessons they had learned from me that have been valuable to them — with the idea that I would finish filling in the journal with lessons I’ve learned. You know, preserving some of that hard earned wisdom we adults are always claiming we have.

Even though of my own grandmother died when I was young, I remember visiting her. I remember feeling her love for me. She always made me feel accepted for who I was and made me feel welcome and wanted in her home.

This year, I encourage you to take a few moments and write down some of those gems of wisdom you have learned from your grandmother. If she is still alive, you will surprise and delight her. Or share them with the special people in your life: your grandchildren, children, or parents.

By sharing the lessons that you have learned from your grandmother, you will not only validate her, but you’ll also let her know of ways she has helped you that she may never have realized. This can be a more personal and touching gift than a dozen roses or another knickknack.

What are some of the valuable lessons you have learned from your grandmother? We look forward to reading your comments.

Wishing a happy Mother’s Day to each of our dear readers, mothers, and grandmothers.

- Grammy Tanda

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So let’s say your grandchildren are coming to your house for a visit. They might want to “play” on your computer. Whoa! Wait! Is it secure? What if they inadvertently download a virus or delete a file? Is it safe? What if they accidentally land on a webpage on “the dark side” of the Internet? How can you keep your grandkids safe online?

Are you worried that your grandkids may accidently see something online that would be harmful to them?

Have you set up a safe environment for your grandchildren?

There are two concerns here. 1. Protecting your computer: keeping your hardware, software, files, documents, and bookmarks secure. 2. Protecting your grandkids: creating a safe environment for them that prevents them from accessing inappropriate content on Internet websites.

So let’s discuss some of these potential problems here in part one of this article. Then in part two, we will outline a plan — what you can do to protect your computer and your grandchildren, and alleviate your concerns.

Do you realize if it weren’t for Edison we’d be watching TV by candlelight?  ~Al Boliska

The Internet is a wonderful place for children to explore — lot’s of interesting sites, interactive games and activities, educational resources, etc. But like the real world, there are places on the Internet that are inappropriate for children. You’ve probably heard and thought about potential dangers for kids online. So, when your grandchildren come to visit, your computer needs to be safe. How do we help our grandkids get the most of this virtual cyberspace, while keeping them safe in it?

Over the years, I have personally used various techniques for protecting my computers and my children, and now my grandchildren. Since threats change with new technologies and modern computers, I have had to stay on top of the solutions. But the basic problems are always the same: bad people trying to do bad things to me and my family and to my computers. The basic solutions remain the same also: keep ahead of the bad guys. Install a shield between you and your computers, and the bad guys.

Now, I’m not trying to be paranoid. It’s like locking your front door at night. You don’t have to obsess over all the potential evil out there. You just lock it to be safe, and you don’t worry about it.

Throughout history, parents and grandparents have been concerned for the safety of their children and teenagers. It seems even more challenging the ever with new types of media and gadgets — radio, TV, music, computers, the Internet, mobile phones, iPods, iPhone…. But we can’t follow children everywhere, holding an umbrella over their heads. We need to teach them how to avoid the dangers in the world.

There are certain activities on the Internet that some adults participate in that are not appropriate for children, and other areas that are suitable for some children and not for others.

Pornography — there is sexually-explicit material on the Internet that it is not appropriate for children to view it or seek it out. And search engine results for innocent topics may occasionally include links to inappropriate websites. Email can be a potential problem, with sexually-explicit spam.

Sexual predators try to disguise themselves as a young person in order to befriend and attract children.

Don’t despair! Even though there are potential dangers on the Internet, it is fairly easy to create a secure environment for your family. In part two, you will find steps you can follow to help ensure that your grandchildren have a positive experience online.

- Shayne

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

We’d like to hear from you. What things do you do to keep your computer safe for children?